Claire Hassler - Journey South

Part I: Minnesota

to Missouri

I initially decided to document this process because it felt symbolic to me. My internship at The Dispatch was my first gig post-grad, and it was also the first time I’d be doing photojournalism full-time. I wasn’t sure if I’d like it, and I was nervous as hell to move 15 hours away from my family to a part of the country I had never even visited before, and where I knew absolutely no one. Besides that though, the nation felt so chaotic and I knew these were unprecedented times. I wanted to remember it.

Mum says goodbye - May 24, 2020 - Eden Prairie, MN || After spending a few days in Eden Prairie to celebrate Liza's birthday, it was time to say goodbye and begin my descent to the South. I grabbed my camera and the few belongings that weren't already in Missouri. I said a teary goodbye to my dad - I hugged him extra tight. Then Mum walked me out. I got in my car and snapped a few frames as she waved goodbye. I took one last look at my childhood home before pulling out of the driveway.

Somewhere in Iowa - May 24, 2020 - Iowa || So, I began the drive south. At some point, I hit a construction stop and came across an old Ford, slumped on the back of a truck somewhere in Iowa. For some reason, I thought the scene was comical. And quintessential Midwest. I leapt into action, assembling my camera as quickly as I could before the traffic light changed so I could capture the scene before me. I was just in time to make a few frames before the truck moseyed on. No worries, my car was not in motion during the making of this image.

The house where Mom grew up – May 24, 2020 – New Hampton, IA || After a visit with my grandpa, I headed out to the farm. It’s where he grew up and where he raised my mom and her three sisters. It’s a seven-minute drive from his current house in town. I fondly remember trips to visit my grandma and grandpa at the farm. We’d eat lots of cookies, play with the farm cats, and soak in the wooden hot tub in the basement. The stairs were steep and creaky, and everything had a vintage feel to it, from the antique furniture to the yellowed pages of the coloring books they'd set out for us.

The old farm – May 24, 2020 – New Hampton, IA || The evening light shines soft and golden on my grandpa’s old farm. I LOVED visiting the farm as a child, though I was always a little afraid of the old barn on the property. I hadn’t been to my grandpa’s and mom’s childhood home in years and wanted to see if it was still the way I remembered it. I’m relieved to say it was almost exactly the same.

Horse – May 24, 2020 – New Hampton, IA || By the time I existed, my grandparents didn’t keep animals on their farm. The old barn had fallen into disrepair and the old pens were overgrown with weeds. Now that my grandpa is renting out the house and land to a young family, the place is teeming with life once again. I came across this horse during my visit and happily snapped a photo.

Late night arrival – May 24, 2020 – Columbia, MO || After sitting behind the wheel for 8 hours, having avoided hitting any deer or having my back-right tire blow out on me, I was relieved to pull into my gravel driveway on Rosemary Lane.

Part II: Missouri to Mississippi

The Missouri phase of my journey south was the final bit of familiarity before I headed off into uncharted territory. I spent a week there visiting friends and wrapping up loose ends.

Extended periods of driving gave me lots of time to reflect on what “home” means. The further I got from Minnesota and Missouri, the stronger the outpouring of love I felt for the two states became. Minnesota is the place I was raised, the place that means the most to me, the place that will always have my heart. Missouri is the place where I grew into the photojournalist that I am today. Mizzou is where I found that identity and my voice.

But I also find it SO cool that I’ve now lived in a straight line down the middle of the country (all in states that start with M, I might add). I was excited to discover what Mississippi would mean to me by the end of my journey there.

Roomies and empty walls – May 31, 2020 – Columbia, MO || Annie and Em sit on my bed as I pack up the last of my belongings on my final night in Missouri. We’d spent the whole week connected at the hip, fitting in every bit of fun we could amid the pandemic and before we parted ways for who-knew-how-long. I can’t help but notice how white and barren my wall is in this photo. My rooms have always been defined by their walls. For as long as I can remember, I’ve covered my bedroom walls with mementos. From my childhood bedroom to my freshman year dorm room, to my apartment in Barcelona, every inch of them were covered as I nested. The fact that the walls are empty definitely signified that change and transition were on the horizon.

Sweet Lane – May 26, 2020 – Columbia, MO || Lane stands in our dark dining room, among the plants that she loves and cares for so dearly, right before heading to her home in Ozark, Missouri to visit family. This was the last time we saw each other, because by the time she returned to Columbia I’d headed south.

The final gathering – May 26, 2020 – Columbia, MO || I made this frame right before Lane left for a visit home. It was the last time all four of us were together. It was a quiet, bittersweet, anticlimactic end to months of fun between the four of us in our house on Rosemary Lane. I really lucked out with three roommates who double as my best friends and who accept me for who I am, as weird as I may be.

The First Night – June 1, 2020 – Starkville, MS || I took this self-portrait on my first night in my new apartment. I anticipated the isolation of moving to a new place all by yourself and decided to head it off by leaning into familiar comforts, like eating ramen noodles with extra butter and reading. All the previous, miniscule steps I’d taken, like going to school out of state, studying abroad, solo traveling in Poland for a week, and getting to Bangkok two nights before the rest of my study abroad class, prepared me for this move and built up my coping skills. Overall, I’d say it was a great first night, and the apartment that was once strange and unfamiliar to me is now one I quite enjoy (and spend a lottttt of time in due to working remotely….).

Audio Diary 1 - June 1, 2020 - Mississippi || I crossed the Mississippi state line and realized how close I was to my FINAL destination. I wanted to press onward but also wanted to take time to reflect. I used Voice Memos to record my thoughts on leaving Mizzou and my best friends and moving to a new state amid a global pandemic and nationwide protests for racial justice. The audio tells the story of how I was feeling way better than rewriting it as text would, so here it is.

Part III: Life in 'Sippi

So, I completed my epic journey to the South… then the real adventure began. Living in Mississippi was a wild ride. Overall: not a bad time. It was hot, but I loved the accents. The bugs were fiercely aggressive, but the crawfish was delicious. It was so green and spread out.

Outside the Dispatch - June 29, 2020 - Columbus, MS

Quiet afternoon at the office - June 7, 2020 - Columbus, MS

One of the biggest regrets I have about the two months I spent in Mississippi is that I didn't get to work in the actual newsroom with the rest of the staff. Everyone was so welcoming, but I know there would've been more camaraderie if we'd been in the office together. Our daily meetings were held virtually and all of our communication was done through slack/phone. I only met my editor a few times in-person throughout the whole internship!

The Dispatch building is also just cool. It's right on Main Street in downtown Columbus. The printing press is in the basement and there's a lot of exposed brick, especially in the studio on the upper floor. For my last week I lived in an apartment above the newsroom too (talk about a short commute!).

Records of The Dispatch - June 26, 2020 - Columbus, MS || It's exciting to think about my photographs contributing to recording the history of this community! My work is ~archived~

Blues and greens at The Dispatch - June 26, 2020 - Columbus, MS

Self portrait in the upstairs studio - June 26, 2020 - Columbus, MS

15 minute parking, one way - June 29, 2020 - Columbus, MS

15 minute parking, another way - June 29, 2020 - Columbus, MS

Funky Tree 1 - July 15, 2020 - Columbus, MS

Funky Tree 2 - July 15, 2020 - Columbus, MS

A home office

I spent a lot of time between the tan walls of my bedroom in my tiny apartment in Starkville. With the newsroom working 100% remotely, my bed became my desk and my home base between assignments.

Overall it wasn't a bad situation- my plants, postcards and pillows made the place homey. My window looked out over a dense woods that were home to lots of birds.

Home office - July 4, 2020 - Starkville, MS || The Fourth of July was a long work day for me. I took this photo during a brief rest as I was testing out some settings on my camera.

Grandma – June 24, 2020 – Starkville, MS || It had been a long, uninspired day, and I was feeling lonely and far away from the people and places I called home. I looked out my window and saw a bright red cardinal perched in the tree outside. It brought an immediate smile to my face, and I scrambled to make a few frames before the bird took flight again. Cardinals have always been my favorite bird. My fondness for them stems partially from them being the first bird I could ever identify as a kid, and partially because my Grandma Rosie loved them too. When I think of her, I always picture her in a red t-shirt. Now that she’s gone, I’m convinced that her spirit lives on in cardinals.

Storms Looming

Storms are something else in Mississippi. They swoop in out of nowhere and are intensely torrential, though they never seem to last too long. You can always tell one is about to hit when the trees start blowing and clouds loom, making it seem like the sky itself is moving towards the ground. While in Mississippi I found shelter mere minutes before a storm hits; I was dumped on profusely, sheltering my camera with grocery bags that I now deem part of my essential equipment; and I waited storms out in my car as water leaked through the cracked door. But my favorite way to watch a storm in Mississippi was from my bedroom window, listening to the rain hit the roof, as I edited the day’s photos.

Storm looming – June 25, 2020 – Columbus, MS || I could tell a storm was coming by the threatening nature of the sky and the way the tall grasses thrashed about. I snapped this photo out of the window of my car while at a red light.

Apartment storm - July 1, 2020 - Starkville, MS || It's funny how, while out on an assignment, seeing a storm coming would fill me with dread and anxiety. But if I was tucked inside my apartment with nowhere I needed to be, the sight of an incoming storm would bring me so much joy! I could spend all day watching storms.

When in doubt, seek green spaces

I had a day and a half to move into my apartment, buy some groceries and get settled. At that point, everything felt foreign- from the spot I parked my car to the locations of the light switches in my room, to the way people talked. It was all unusual and I felt, predictably, uneasy. I’ve learned that when I feel existential or anxious, the best thing I can possibly to do to cope is find solace in nature. So, I explored the River Walk in Columbus, which I’d seen when exploring Columbus via Google Maps.

Scenes from the Columbus River Walk – June 2, 2020 – Columbus, MS

From that first evening and throughout my time in Mississippi, I found so much solace in nature whenever I felt uneasy. The Columbus River Walk, Plymouth Bluff Environmental Center, and the Sam D. Hamilton Noxubee Wildlife Refuge became my safe havens. I never got tired of exploring and photographing them. Here are some images from my most peaceful memories of Mississippi:

Scenes from Sam D. Hamilton Noxubee Wildlife Refuge – June 14, 2020 – Starkville, MS || I went hiking with my coworker Stella and her boyfriend Sky at the wildlife refuge and it was so nice to have both fresh air and social interaction. I tried to capture the beauty of the cypress swamps that are abundant here. The photos still don’t do it the justice it deserves, but it’s my best attempt so far. I love the way the light shines through the congested trees, the way it reflects on the still brown water.

Cypress Knee - July 12, 2020 - Starkville, MS

An ode to Cypress Knees

Before moving to Mississippi, cypress swamps weren't really on my radar, and I'd never even heard of a cypress knee. The knees are little stumps that poke out of the water around the trunk of the tree. They're part of the tree's root system and help stabilize the cypress in the swampy ground. Besides their practical function though, they look cool as hell! They're a bunch of quirky little stumps... all different shapes and sizes... usually with other cool stuff growing on them... I think cypress knees are becoming my favorite natural feature EVER.

Still waters - July 12, 2020 - Starkville, MS

Big tree - July 18, 2020 - Columbus, MS

Submerged tree - July 12, 2020 - Starkville, MS

Bird flying high - July 12, 2020 - Starkville, MS

Scenes from Plymouth Bluff - July 18, 2020 - Columbus, MS

Flowers - July 12, 2020 - Starkville, MS

Z, Griz & Dad take a walk - July 12, 2020 - Starkville, MS

Gator! - July 12, 2020 - Starkville, MS || This was the first and only time I saw an alligator in Mississippi. I was with my family and we're all convinced the gator came out because Grizzly looked like a snack.

Goodnight Moon - July 22, 2020 - Starkville, MS || Some blurry moon photos from my third (3rd) attempt at photographing Comet NEOWISE at Sam D Hamilton Noxubee Wildlife Refuge. I got frustrated/burnt out pretty quick and stopped photographing after I made just a few frames, then I spent the rest of the night sitting on top of my car looking at the stars, which made me feel quite a bit better. Looking back on them, I’ve decided I like these quirky, technically imperfect frames.

A guide to being a driver, in Mississippi, in the summer, in a car without AC:

The road outside Plymouth Bluff - June 26, 2020 - Columbus, MS

1) Drive with your windows down, always. Hit the highways whenever you can to maximize air flow. Driving 30 miles per hour is pretty uncomfy. 70 miles per hour isn’t too bad, so take the shortest route through downtown to get to the highway.

2) Your hair has to be up, especially if it’s long, otherwise it will become a tangled mess and you’ll start balding after brushing out all the snarls. Here are my usual hairdos, ranked in order of effectiveness at keeping hair out of my face while I drive: ponytail, French braid, half-up pony, half-up braid, normal braid, down (Don’t go down. Just don’t do it.). Adding a hat or thick headband has also proven very effective.

3) Driving before 10 a.m. isn’t too bad. Neither is driving after 6 p.m. Driving between noon and 3 p.m. is terrible. Avoid doing this if you can.

4) Keep a metal thermos full of water in your car at all times. I recommend Klean Kanteen because it will keep the water pretty cool, even if it’s in your car for two days straight. Hydrate before and after any journey.

5) Having a stick of deodorant in your car (so you can maintain SOME level of professionalism by not smelling when you show up to places)… will not work. The deodorant will melt to the consistency of microwaved butter that, when you try to put on, will smear all over your armpits and clothes like white paint. Instead, prop your arms up on the window and passenger seat while driving so you get a breeze. Then hope the people you interact with don’t have a strong sense of smell.

6) Park in shade whenever you can. Shade is your best friend. Yes, it is worth it to park down the street and walk if it means your car is shaded. Buy a windshield reflector and use it when there is no shade to park in.

7) Having a handheld fan won’t help. It’ll just blow more hot air at you. The same goes for using the vents in your car. Hot air on hot skin just does not feel good. I never invested in a spray bottle but I'm guessing that would feel phenomenal.

8) Keep a pair of shorts in your car to change into if you have to wear long pants to something. But in all honesty… never wear long pants.

9) Keep a cheap pair of sunglasses in your car. The last thing you need is sweat accumulating around your eyes because you can’t stop squinting.

10) Remember that this experience builds character and grit! Telling people you survived a Mississippi summer without AC will give you major street cred down the line.

Oscar on the Natchez Trace - June 28, 2020 - Mathiston, MS || The Natchez Trace is a national scenic highway that runs from Natchez, Mississippi to Nashville, Tennessee. A section of it runs near Starkville so I decided to explore it for an afternoon. I drove from mile marker 205 to 185, from Mathiston to just past French Camp. There were some great short hikes right off the road and the historic district of French Camp was definitely a highlight.

A day on the Natchez Trace

Col. James Drane Home - June 28, 2020 - French Camp, MS || This house looks identical to the one in Outlander, my favorite show that literally is about time travel and takes place in America in the 1700s. I geeked.

A bedroom in the Drane Home - June 28, 2020 - French Camp, MS || Besides briefly looking at a map, I didn't do much research about stops along the Natchez Trace. As you can imagine, I was very surprised (and a little confused) when I stumbled upon an elaborate and empty colonial village in French Camp.

Pigs of the historic district - June 28, 2020 - French Camp, MS

My favorite humans join me in Mississippi

Fam in the hotel - July 10, 2020 - Starkville, MS || My mom, dad, sis and dog came to visit for a weekend! We got lots of takeout and spent hours poolside.

Fam at the wildlife refuge - July 12, 2020 - Starkville, MS || I had to show my family my all-time favorite spot: the wildlife refuge! This was the day we saw the alligator. I think they were impressed by Mississippi's natural beauty (I know I was when I first came here).

Hello, Birmingham!

Showplace of the South - July 26, 2020 - Birmingham, AL || The Alabama Theatre, built in 1927 and deemed the “Showplace of the South.” The building was closed so I couldn’t go inside, but the signs on the building felt like a warm welcome to the city and state.

Alabama sign - July 26, 2020 - Birmingham, AL || It took some time to warm up/take out my camera in the morning. This sign motivated me to start making pictures!

Magic City - July 26, 2020 - Birmingham, AL || If I'd had more time, I would've walked or biked on the Rotary Trail, but taking a photo of the sign had to do for this visit.

Quiet streets - July 26, 2020 - Birmingham, AL || I'm not sure if it was because of Covid or because it was a Sunday in the Deep South, but I swear I've never seen a city so quiet! Passing someone on the sidewalk was a rare occurrence.

I packed up my car on a Sunday morning and spontaneously drove two and a half hours to visit Birmingham. I'm so glad I went! I spent the day walking around making photographs and looking at the Civil Rights Movement monuments. There were several different paths you could follow, all of them starting from Kelly Ingram park in the center, that would take you along different march routes and teach about different facets of activism people used during the 60s. It was amazing to physically walk through the history and to learn more about local activists in Birmingham that often get left out of the narrative when we learn about the Civil Rights Movement on a national scale.

The Four Spirits - July 26, 2020 - Birmingham, AL || A small part of the statue commemorating Addie May Collins, Carol Denise McNair, Carole Rosamond Robertson & Cynthia Diane Wesley, four young girls who were murdered by the KKK on Bloody Sunday in the 16th Street Baptist Church bombing.

"Peace Be Still; Mark 4:39" - July 26, 2020 - Birmingham, AL || From the plaque describing the monument: "On Palm Sunday 1963 Rev. N.H. Smith, Rev. John T. Porter and Rev. A.D. King led a sympathy march from St. Paul United Methodist Church down 6th Avenue North in support of Rev. Martin Luther King Jr., Rev. Fred Shuttlesworth and Rev. Ralph Abernathy, who were in jail. 2,000 marchers assembled behind Smith, Porter and King like a “storm cloud.” The march climaxed at Kelly Ingram Park where the marchers were met by billy clubs and police dogs. In the heat of the event these three ministers knelt to pray. This statue was built to capture the photograph taken at that event. These three ministers, along with other clergy and laypersons, were at the core of the movement that changed the world."

16th Street Baptist Church - July 26, 2020 - Birmingham, AL

Blooming flowers - July 26, 2020 - Birmingham, AL || Pictured is 16th Street Baptist Church, one of the main hubs of the Civil Rights Movement in Alabama, and the place where four young girls were murdered when the KKK bombed the church on Sept. 15, 1963 on what became known as Bloody Sunday.

Social Distanced Tourism - July 26, 2020 - Birmingham, AL || My last stop: the top of the Vulcan. Here I learned more about Birmingham’s industrial founding and the minerals it’s built on top of that are still so important today.

The Mighty Vulcan - July 26, 2020 - Birmingham, AL || The Vulcan is a big guy, made of the area’s iron, that sits on top of Red Mountain. Layers of limestone, iron ore and coal are pushed together in ridges to form the hills surrounding the city, and those minerals are what originally caused industry to come to the area.

The sun sets on Birmingham - July 26, 2020 - Birmingham, AL || I left Birmingham feeling thankful for all that I saw and learned. It's a beautiful city with an important history. I hope to be back one day.

'I just need to touch the ocean'

Home for the night - August 1, 2020 - Waveland, MS || After I learned about Liza’s relapse and decided to end my internship early to go back home, I knew I needed to drive south a few hours to see the Gulf during my last weekend in Mississippi. I packed up my tent and drove to Bucaneer State Park. I was awestruck by the houses on stilts and the warm, shallow water. A nice couple invited me to eat dinner with them outside their Airstream Camper. I went swimming under the full moon. I didn’t feel like making many photographs with my camera (in fact I regretted bringing it because of the intense heat and sand) but I took a lot more photos on my phone. It was a good few days to drive & soak in the sights; turn my mind off for a while.

Oysters with a view - August 2, 2020 - Ocean Springs, MS || On day two of my trip to the Gulf I explored Bay St. Louis and Ocean Springs (just past Biloxi). I stopped at this restaurant to eat fresh, raw Gulf oysters. The first three were tasty, the last three got a littttttle hard to swallow. Glad I stopped! Nice view. After this stop I took one last dip at Ocean Springs's private beach and then I drove back north to Columbus.

This isn't how it was supposed to end.

When my mom called me and said Liza's cancer is back, it's everywhere, and it's not going away, I knew in my gut that I needed to go home. To this day, I know it was the right decision. I know home with my family is where I need to be right now. But knowing that didn't make things any less confusing as I was packing up my apartment and scrapping story ideas I'd been brainstorming for the next month in MS.

An unexpected end - August 7, 2020 - Eden Prairie, MN || I pulled up to my quiet house on my quiet street in Eden Prairie, MN. It had been a 16 hour drive over two days. I was primarily relieved to have arrived (and relieved that Osc made it in one piece). But as I stood in the middle of the road looking down the dim street one direction, then the opposite direction, a small part of me couldn’t help but think: ‘Is this really it? This isn’t how it was supposed to end.’ Then I grabbed my bags and walked inside.

My Journey South ended abruptly and not in the way I thought it would, but I’m thankful for the experience. I hold the memories of it deep in my heart, they make me happy when I think back on them. Mississippi has so much to offer and I hope to be back one day soon.

Journey South - Mississippi

Scenes from Plymouth Bluff - July 18, 2020 - Columbus, MS

Scenes from Plymouth Bluff - July 18, 2020 - Columbus, MS

Scenes from Plymouth Bluff - July 18, 2020 - Columbus, MS

Scenes from Plymouth Bluff - July 18, 2020 - Columbus, MS

Scenes from Plymouth Bluff - July 18, 2020 - Columbus, MS

Scenes from Plymouth Bluff - July 18, 2020 - Columbus, MS

Flowers - July 12, 2020 - Starkville, MS

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